Crap

Here's the text of the e-mail I just got:

Thanks so much again for sharing your revised manuscript with me. As you know, I've been on the lookout for a cult-themed literary novel, so I was excited to dive into The Cabin. While I found elements of the cult fascinating, I didn't feel that Josh and many of the secondary characters would be relatable enough to the average teen reader. Also, I worried that the third person narration felt overly removed, at time, and that the pacing wasn’t quite quick enough for our readership.

Given these concerns, I don’t feel that I'm the right editor for this project. I do wish you the best of luck in finding a publishing home for The Cabin.

So I give up.

Just kidding, although it's hard to stay motivated.

No, scratch that. Trying to stay motivated is like pushing through a pool filled with sticky, tepid oatmeal. Hmmm, maybe that still doesn't capture the feeling here.

How about: Rejections are nails that are being hammered by my self-doubt into the coffin of me as a writer. Yeah, that's more like it.

It's particularly disappointing because I had found a back door to get this manuscript off to this editor. Plus, she was looking for a YA book with my subject matter. Plus, I'm naive and probably don't do enough work before I send things off.

Oh well.

No, not 'oh well.'

Bring it on.

I can write. I can tell stories. I just had two story ideas come to me this week. I have stories to tell and I can tell them well. I can learn to tell them better and I can sell them and live as a writer. I can and I freaking, ever-loving, darn-tooting, for the love of all that's good and right WILL!

If I said swear words, that previous sentence would have read like a sailor who just stepped on the crustiest, sharpest barnacle.

I have to do some work now, but that's my update. I am going to put together a concrete writing schedule.

Do you realize (all six of you reading this (hey, that's up from 3)) how hard it is to make time to write? Five kids, all of them fun, my wife translating, bread needing to be made along with other household chores, and then exercising... not to mention a job that sucks the energy out of me... all combine to make it tough. Just thought I'd mention that. Just so... you know... pity.

No, keep your pity. Let it turn into fury and turn that fury and passion into a kick-a## story.

Lay off my somnium.

Just stopping in quickly on this Tuesday evening...

to record my day. And yesterday.

For writing, I have basically been fighting on Helium to finally win a category. I have written my very best to this category, and so far it is okay. I truly feel like my stuff is the best in its titles. I would really like to place first, overall first, in one of these contests for once. So this is the week I am going for it.

Anyway, today we took Annemarie to the airport so she could fly to California (LA) to see a friend of hers. This is actually the first time Annemarie's been away from the the kids and me for any more than most of a day. So it should be very fun for her, and may involved tears from kids, but it will certainly cause no harm in anyone. I miss her, for sure, but I have been kept busy with the kids and other work.

I sent some writing samples to Nature's Sunshine yesterday, as I had applied to a part time job there. I could use the extra work, particularly if they allow telecommuting. I also got an e-mail from Lena at Mountain Reservations, (where I interviewed last Wednesday) telling me that they would not be doing second interviews and that they would send word by 5PM tomorrow. So I am actually kind of anxious now. I know that I would love that job. I know that I would not love the commute. But the work looks awesome, as do the people, and the money is vital. So if they offer me the job, at a good salary, I will take it. For sure.

I also, finally, got my first advance payment today from Cengage Learning, the ones publishing the graded reader series. Wahoo! It was a spectacular feeling. Seriously, I got kind of weepy. What a wonderful thing to get paid pretty well for doing what you have dreamed of doing all of your life! I am still so excited that I might even make a typo!

But it's late and I have much to do around the house. I love my job; I love my family; I love my life. Ain't it sickening?

carpe somnium

(I'm going to be a bestselling author.)

End of Tuesday, February 5th, 2008

Well howdy partners. Sorry, I said that because I just saw a good western movie and was in the mood.

I have written several articles for www.helium.com over the last couple of days. I am wanting to place in a contest there, as well as hit the 800 article mark this week. So tomorrow I hope to do so. Plus, they are still doing their reward-a-thon and every article I write gets extra $$ these days.

I do hope to work on The Cabin this week still, although I am going out of town from tomorrow until Saturday. I will probably do some work on it while I am gone. I don't exactly want to do this trip (it's to a conference that ChartedCourse is doing) but I need to go as the writer for the company so I can report on it.

I actually applied to a job today. It is with my church: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I am not sure I will even get a call on it, but I felt an impression that I ought to check their employment website and so I did. I immediately found an opening for Assistant Editor for one of the church magazines, called The Friend. So I applied and tried hard to really accentuate my abilities as a writer. Even if this job doesn't happen, I will still probably need to try to get employment in the next five or six months. Money is running low and we can't really afford insurance.

But I will still fight for the dream and I hope to get The Cabin done as soon as possible. Sometimes I feel like I am pinning a lot of my hopes on this book. I think that's because I have a feeling that it can be really good, as long as I get after it and work hard on it. But I really need to work at it. Helium is a great place, but it's not paying the bills.

This is one reason that I am going to the conference. I hope to learn some things about real estate investing that I can use. We plan to kill our portfolio and use that $$ for investment in real estate. The stock market is bleeding badly and I just can't see keeping our shares when it's such a good time to get into property. Yep, it is a buyer's market right now, although some might argue that.

My, these posts sure do wander sometimes.

Here're a couple articles I have done for Helium that I am happy with:

http://www.helium.com/tm/843907/valentines-hallmark-holiday-empty
http://www.helium.com/tm/841753/movie-amadeus-teenaged-wolfgang
http://www.helium.com/tm/841350/bottled-water-trend-consumers

I hope you enjoy them. I got a comment from somebody who is actually reading this blog. That's very nice and thank you! Anybody else who wants to comment can feel free!

carpe somnium

It's really still Wednesday for me

I just got back from seeing National Treasure: Book of Secrets. Way over the top, but still fun times. I've got no real problems, except for the fact that none of the romantic relationships are well-motivated.

Anyway, I wrote a neat-o article on Helium this morning as I began my writing day. Here's the link: http://www.helium.com/tm/800295/anybody-eddie-murphys-movie

I enjoyed writing that.

I also got another chapter of Mars Betrayal done today. I am not certain that I am going to finish it this week, but I am still going to try. I intend to get two good chapters in tomorrow. I am shooting for about 5000 words. The entire book is really only going to be about 16-18000 words. It's a graded reader, okay? So it turns out that 'betrayal' is actually a little bit of a high level word for the level I am shooting for. I guess I will put it in the glossary.

Life is good. I love my job and I love that I am finally pushing past my laziness and easily-distractedness. I've got a lot to do, and I can't let anything stop me.

Carpe somnium!